I can't save me
by achildofthestars
Summary: Clark/Lois. The Doomsday fight that shocks a nation and leaves L. Lane alone.


_Title: I can't save me_

_Spoilers: Well, I always say for all eps past and future._

_Summary: AU I think. My take on the Doomsday fight, though unlike current speculation, it takes place in the middle of Season 9.

* * *

  
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Start again, over, new. Turn back time so this time the world would be different; _he_ would be different, better, stronger, smarter. Air sucked heavily into his lungs, raging with smoke and tasting of cold death lining the streets of destruction. Clark gagged - too much reality - and threw a hand around his throat, mistaking the gurgling sound for spit and not for what it was: blood.

Another cry echoed somewhere, loud and despairing, calling for the hero the world needed. A building fell, toppling in a waterfall of ruins that imploded with dust and ash, someone's life billowing out for anyone to see. He started trudging forward, left leg weaker than the right, chest heaving with the pain of breathing. His shoes left prints - snow and ash the same in permeability- in one direction, the only set leading towards the epicenter, the beginning, the end.

The creature found him, remaining motionless as Clark refused to back down - fear was left somewhere near Chloe's body - ready. Green became less prominent, the rocks dislodged haphazardly seeming to miss this area of Metropolis. Strength returned to his ailing form and Clark glared at the beast who'd once been shackled by Davis Bloome: a vessel.

"Fulfill your destiny, Doomsday."

Loud, thunderous, no Smallville Clark Kent behind the tone, and then his body was speeding away, a red-blue blur followed by a grey mass.

* * *

They fought - a fight for the ages - continuously, hit against stronger hit and blow for blow even. The ground shook under their feet, earthquakes ranging for miles beyond the city limits, the two foes still breathing and losing. Clark dodged a punch, only to be thrown to the sooty dirt and then flung into the air, a grey mist forming in the dusky evening. His back crushed into the side of a hospital, the wailing of the emergency alarms shutting off - a whir and then nothing but his breath - and not dying little by little like the movies.

A blink and he was up, one foot and then the other speeding toward the enemy, not losing hope just yet. It was like nothing he'd felt before, hitting more than solid wall, not being able to break through the other side. He roared into the monster's side as it groaned in return, falling into a yellow truck left alone - the withering driver ghostly watching beside the tire.

Five seconds and no motion, Clark stood gasping for air still, tightening his fists - please be over. One cautious step forward brought him closer, his eyes roving over the alien and waiting for the rebound, inevitable. He brought his fists over his head, a single motion in his mind to bring this all to an end, but the 'possum blocked the blow, the force ricocheting off his solid being and sliding back inside to Clark who sailed even farther into the sky than before.

This time he flew - the power surfacing a week before - catching himself before he kissed the ground, before he mangled a woman babbling for a 'wonder popkin sometime.'

* * *

The crowds screamed - Stop it- but he was only one man, one Kryptonian warring against something that couldn't be defeated. He protected them, catching them when Doomsday flicked them in the sickly air and used the opportunity to hurtle him across a busy street filled with more innocents he'd sworn to protect at all costs. Clark's attempts to draw the death machine away failed, the monster hanging onto his leverage with glee and resuming his massacre.

He saw her then, dark hair tangled around her shoulders, one dark red cut across her cheek and another over her eyebrow, her left arm held close to her body but opening in pain as she grabbed a boy and pushed their fragile bodies away from the thrown vehicle. Lois - God, Lois - was here, not listening to him as per usual, getting in the way, not being safe.

His eyes closed - tired, unusual - and he felt his body fall to the foul ground, stomach hitting first and everything else second. There was a collective gasp, a silence filling their mouths as loud as the epic battle had been. Even Doomsday halted, his goal of destruction and distraction faltering as the newly named Superman lay quiet.

No - her voice echoed faintly, lost to his ears for the first time.

* * *

_'No!' She ran, heels forgotten, rumbling through the chaos and jerking his arm back. 'You can't go out there, Clark!'_

_'I don't have time to argue, Lois!' He'd had to yell to be heard. 'Find Chloe and get out of here as quick as you can! The west should be clear!'_

_A row of reporters ran by them, forcing them into the wall of the hallway; his hands cupped her elbows and hers huddled to her chest. One moment, a small, too late moment, but he kept it. He let himself feel it, not pulling apart when the way became clear, looking at her with no veil over his eyes._

_'You don't have to do this! Superman's coming!'_

_The hope in her voice, the unrelenting belief, shook him, brought him full circle from friend to wishful lover. He loved her, Lois Lane. _

_'Go before it's too late! I'll find you! I'll see you when it's over!'_

_'No!' This time more insistent than the first. 'I'm not leaving you here with that **thing **out there!'_

_'This isn't the time to start caring about my life, Lois!'_

_Laugh, smile, anything, he thought. He wanted her to give him one last memory of Lois and Clark, the dynamic duo, number one and two reporters of The Daily Planet._

_'If I lose track of you I'll have to take Shelby and wrap myself in a bubble!'_

_Not die, lose track of. His throat closed awkwardly, the sirens from across town sounded off, rotating its lullaby, and he knew she knew. Her hands gripped the fabric of his shirt._

_'You don't have to be the hero!'_

_When had her eyes matched his? The fear and denied love finally breaking through, but only at the end. Gently, his hands covered hers, his heartbeat picking up speed along with hers._

_'The only way you'll be safe is to leave! Don't do anything '**Lois**!' '_

_He'd broken contact then, turning his back on her and running out the doors before speeding his way to the sounds of judgment.

* * *

_Now, his mind yelled, forcing his body upwards - mouth set in a grimace - and running in tight circles around the curious Doomsday speeding off somewhere they couldn't see. The people remained hushed, eyes set in the place the savior had disappeared.

He's left us - A brunette glared at the man staring listlessly at the burning city, waiting for her hero to return, to end this for all their sakes. And she was the first to see him, high above the sky, a moving dot in the darkening evening sky, flying faster than she'd been able to see this whole week. Her eyes moved to the hellish alien still looking around itself for the red and blue superhuman, and for the first time in a very long time, she prayed. For all of them.

Someone cried out, a finger pointed in the air - dirty and bloody - and Doomsday started his charge. Lois felt her mouth open as the two figures closed it, Superman flying dangerously low and barely visible now with Doomsday at his highest gear. Without thought, she pushed her hands over her ears, anticipating something but not knowing what.

* * *

This was his peak; he felt it. Every fiber of his muscles worked in sync, his mind was focused on one goal. The sheer power nearly overwhelmed him, making him feel somewhat like what he imagined a god would feel like. Clark pushed himself further - one last hurrah - for the inevitable, the must-be-end because after this, he would have nothing left.

Doomsday roared. Superman responded with his own. Three. Two. One.

* * *

Forwards, backwards, sideways, into each other, it was all the same. They collided, one full force blow that blew the crowd on their backs, the street to crumble into powdery tar, the glass windows to burst on one same note. The sound was unbelievable, deafening some survivors for the rest of their lives. The tremble as the two aliens dropped to their resting spots was felt for a hundred miles.

And then there was nothing - Nothing.

* * *

Her breath held - Get up now - along with everyone else's. One minute passed, slow and tortuous in its journey, but she didn't know since her watch died with the collision. There was no movement, no red dragging itself from the shadows, no grey grunting with fury. Lois felt herself moving, sneaker clad feet stumbling at first in the debris and uneven no longer street. Then she ran, to him, always him.

She skid to her knees when she saw his body, the red cape torn in half and utterly useless now. The skin peeking from his suit remained raw, red, bleeding, and her heart dropped when she realized he wasn't healing. Her hands found his head, lightly cradling it in her lap and wiping the dirt away as best she could while she waited.

Hopefully - Come on, come on - He heard softly against his ear, a sensation of something wet touching his forehead and falling down softly. The force to open his eyes caused him to gasp, the pain searing through him, claiming him without remorse, a penance fulfilled.

"Superman?"

Lois - I love you - he blindly reached for her and she grasped his hand close to her face as she bent down. She was hurt. He felt regret for being brought to this world, hurting every single person he'd loved. He wished to take it back, just take it away.

"You're going to be okay. Okay?"

"Is," Clark choked, "Doomsday dead?"

Her fingers threaded to his hair. "Yes. You did it." She smiled with tears staining her face. "You saved us."

_You saved us_. He nodded his head, sighing in relief before he felt his body begin to fade to dark. One last look- to take with him - at the woman he realized too late he'd loved all this time, and he wished to take back his wish. He didn't want to miss her, never know her, never kiss her.

The last - the very last - of his strength came when he caught her lips. It was as if he'd never known a woman before her. It was ----

"Superman?" Her voice cracked. "Superman?" She shook him, believing he would open his eyes for her and live because he was a superhuman being from another planet. But he didn't.

"Clark?" she whispered, shoved into his neck.

* * *

A/N: So...?


End file.
